it certainly makes you harder to hate

I've been mostly keeping to myself since the arrival of Demetrius' body. I'd let people help me with burying him but after that, I'd disappeared. When I went out, it was at night to lessen the chance someone I knew saw me and even then, I made sure my trips were short.

Everything was such a mess. I didn't know how I was going to continue living here with what I'd done. Being back in Serra meant I could at least try and atone for what I'd done by helping Laia and Darin. But, I was here now, here with people that I'd tried not to care about (and did anyway). Separation and disconnection was the only way I could see to keep them safe.

I, of course, hadn't told them that.

The sun was just starting to set on another day of me keeping to myself inside my apartment. I'd taken to trying to use the appliances in my kitchen since I was isolating myself so much. I'd only burned a few things though one of those things had just been burned so the smell of smoke and charred food was wafting through my apartment.

I'd opened my windows, letting the warm air in and taken a seat on sofa with a book. I'd been doing this a lot recently too, trying to absorb the history of a place that had shaken me so much. I wanted to know why and what and how. The books weren't providing much but I continued on because I needed to do something to fill up the time that I now had.