I couldn't help but think that maybe it was more selfish than brave. I hadn't tried to take anyone else but Laia and if I could have avoided that, I would have. I left Helene behind, left her to deal with Marcus and the all the Gens that were out for blood. I left her behind with my mother.

I don't know if that could be considered brave. I don't know if that could even be considered a move that someone you called your best friend would make. I can only hope that Helene survives.

I don't have much time to think about that when she pulls me closer and I go willingly, shifting around so I don't completely crush her with my weight but am still able to lean against her comfortably. I shiver again, knowing that she'll feel it this time and I hope she chalks it up to the proximity and not the fact that I haven't been this close to someone in a long, long time.

I'm not a complete novice but bleeding skies, it's been a long time since I've wanted to be this close to someone so I'm worrying about doing something wrong that will turn her off and turn her away from me.

"I haven't done anything like this in awhile," I say, breathing the words against her lips and squeezing her hand. "I'm sorry if I do something wrong. It's been...a long time."